DOH!

I can be so goddamned gullible sometimes. Jesus. I wrote about this a while ago, and how beautiful of a find it was for me, these 'lost' tribes. But turns out...Dumbass. But that doesn't bother me so much, as long as they're not a bunch of loin-clothed painted up Apocalypto people. They're real. And they're beautiful.

Also the other day I said I would show you that creepy bus stop guy's poetry website, so...this is it. Definitely not my cup of vanilla black tea. I'm more of a Ginsberg kinda gal. (Read 'Howl'!)

COLOURFUL LIKE HERMES

God..everytime my friend Naomi goes on trips she hauls back the most four-dimensional, character-brimming shots. Have a couple of my faves...

[the eldest son gets his head shaved for a funeral ceremony. I hate it when my friends back in T'dad have to go through this. Who wants everyone to know that a loved one died while you're walking down the street? Bless him.]

[dig the guy in the dark sunglasses in the background]

Anyway, the parts of Abu Dhabi and Dubai you don't see are starting to morph into this. This place is thick and spilling over with hidden beauty. Fuck the Burj. Try looking behind that, in the shadow of its impressiveness. I urge you, if you have no obligations and you find yourself in Dubai, take the public buses. ABSOLUTELY don't if you are planning to get somewhere on time, though. But I've experienced the real Dubai just by being stuck on public transportation all. day. long. for this internship. It's been a real eye-opener. So, as much as the hours are long, and the office chair at VIVA can seriously paralyse your bum, and the 2 hour bus journeys that it takes for me to get there, I am very grateful for this experience. I've never seen so much of this place that I live in.

BABY WENT TO AMSTERDAM

ANDREW LEFT! He's off in Amsterdam now, on some relative's boat by day, partying in the unknown underground by night. Jealous with an exaggeratedly capital 'J'. ENJOY, MY PET!
Sneaky cow...

THE TEN THINGS

1. SUMMER SEGMENTS! Or Spring rather. A natural wonder spread across the fields of Hitsujiyama Park in Chichibu, Japan. Moss Phlox flowers.



2. I had a dream about it being really early morning. I was sleeping in my parent's bed but they were not around. My sister was making racket outside and knocking on my door and trying to get me to wake up and come out and go sailing with her. She wouldn't stop begging. I just ignored her. Eventually I got so fed up and wanted to get back to sleep so I flung the door open to yell and there was Ellen Page looking at me, smiling. She said it was her all along, and she really really really needed me to go with her because I knew how to handle the boat better and she was scared to go on her own. It was so early it was still dark out, and the waves would be major and thrashing and angry. So, because it was Ellen Page, my girl crush, I started getting dressed slowly. She told me that Diablo Cody(Juno screenwriter) always talked about me, my work, my writing, how great I was at my craft; and said she was always quoting me. And she was serious too. And that's why this was a dream. Anyway, it ends off, I think, with me saying 'Well tell Diablo I said I think she's fuckin' hot.'

3. I got a Facebook Friend Request from Sherel. Still not believing that she blocked me in the heat of fury. Anyway, there is no explanation for why we are now friends and talking again like...a month later. She just up and texted me one day while I was at a bus stop at 2am somewhere...and we've planned to meet up for drinks this week like nothing ever went down. Okay. I can dig it.

4. So I just spent roughly £6 on this Keracare foam wrap set formula to attempt wrapping my hair at night to keep it smooth and stuff instead of rowdy and chaotic when I wake but I have serious skills issues. How come all other black girls wrap their hair effortlessly as if they were born doing it save for me?! UGH I'm such a fuckin' Oreo! It's in a fuckin' ponytail for bed. FUCK THAT!

5. I can't believe how hot I am.

6. I went to the library at 9am for some reason today, to get out copies of 'A Moveable Feast' and 'The Lonely Londoners' but apparently, today was a bank holiday (so they were opening at 11am). So, I jumped on a happy sunny bus with happy sunny people to Marble Arch and went on a ridiculously fruitful Primark shopping spree, where I faced my fears and dug into size 8 pants (rather than my usual size 10) and I came out with the sexiest motherfuckin' pair of tight as lycra black skinny jeans. Jen from Gnarlitude ain't got nothin' on me in them jeans. SHIT. As soon as I came home I just HAD to set myself a task in them. So I braved the student-infested lawn and went to get a coke from the vending machine. This hot lounging blonde guy reacted instantly! ...Okay, but not to my jeans. He said, 'Wow, that girl's sunglasses are fucking epic.' That's okay though. I still took it and flipped my hair and ignored him and walked on in my metal band tshirt and SEXXXYYYY JEAANSSS (AHH!). But I really have to question his whereabouts over the past year, as my sunglasses were only the increasingly popular red wayfarers featured in my blog's header :s

7. I find it really difficult to produce a short story now that it is not required of me. But today, after my Primark haunt, I sat in Starbucks for roughly two hours and wrote several pages of any and everything for the first time since school got out. I'm really worried about this in the future though...It seems like story ideas have evaded me with the arrival of vacation.

8. Four words on film. The Science of Sleep. Rent it, buy it, burn it, steal it, just so long as you see it. Gael Garcia Bernal and Charlotte Gainsbourg!!!

9. I have nuff love for my friend Damian. He messaged me to find out the dates I'll be in Trinidad this summer because he's having a major joint birthday party with his girlfriend and isn't holding it unless I am there. AND I'M SO THERE, BABE! And organizing the DJ it seems...And I'm thinking that I just might re-do my 19th with them too because I didn't get a fair shot this time around what with all my crying and depression over getting old. Yeah, I have incomprehensible issues and am probably making my entire reader population feel geriatric. Sorry.

10. There's something you should know. I own retainers. I make everything cool though so they are hot pink. My teeth are back to their old shifty ways so I am going to start back wearing them as much as possible this summer. I'm talking to myself to hear the slight lisp it creates when you are re-familiarizing yourself with them. I guess I'll have to remain speechless for a couple days.

HMMMM...

Anonymous, huh? Gonna make things hard for me? I don't like anonymity. You should email me. Enlighten me.

I FEEL LIKE THE LAST COCA COLA IN THE DESERT

WE HAVE HERE (taken from mirror.co.uk) a list of words in other languages for things you wanted to say in English but our language failed. Like I was praying that there would be a simple word for the person you want to headbutt who is walking slowly in front of you on a busy sidewalk and you are trying to catch your bus. Anyway, I am about to tape this to my wall. Lookout for some of these phrases in posts to come.

Kaelling - Danish: a woman who stands on her doorstep yelling obscenities at her kids.

Pesamenteiro - Portuguese: one who joins groups of mourners at the home of a dead person, apparently to offer condolences but in reality is just there for the refreshments.

Okuri-OKAMI - Japanese: literally a "see-you-home-wolf". A man who feigns thoughtfulness by offering to see a girl home only to try to molest her once he gets in the door.

Jayus - Indonesian: someone who tells a joke so unfunny you can't help laughing.

Spesenritter - German: a person who shows off by paying the bill on the firm's money, literally "an expense knight".

Kamaki - Greek: the young local guys strolling up and down beaches hunting for female tourists, literally "harpoons".

Kanjus Makkhicus - Hindi: a person so miserly that if a fly falls into his cup of tea, he'll fish it out and suck it dry before throwing it away.

Giri-GIRI - Hawaiian pidgin: the place where two or three hairs stick up, no matter what.

Pelinti - Buli, Ghana: to move very hot food around inside one's mouth.

Dii-KOYNA - Ndebele, South Africa: to destroy one's property in anger.

Hanyauku - Rukwangali, Namibia: walking on tiptoes across warm sand.

Tartle - Scottish: to hesitate when you are introducing someone whose name you can't quite remember.

Vovohe Tahtsenaotse - Cheyenne, US: to prepare the mouth before speaking by moving or licking one's lips.

Prozvonit - Czech and Slovak: to call someone's mobile from your own to leave your number in their memory without them picking it up.

Hira Hira - Japanese: the feeling you get when you walk into a dark and decrepit old house in the middle of the night.

Koi No Yokan - Japanese: a sense on first meeting someone that it is going to evolve into love.

Cafune - Brazilian Portuguese: the tender running of one's fingers through the hair of one's mate.

Shnourkovat Sya - Russian: when drivers change lanes frequently and unreasonably.

Gadrii Nombor Shulen Jongu - Tibetan: giving an answer that is unrelated to the question, literally "to give a green answer to a blue question".

Biritululo - Kiriwani, Papua New Guinea: comparing yams to settle a dispute.

Poronkusema - Finnish: the distance equal to how far a reindeer can travel without a comfort break.

Gamadj - Obibway, North America: dancing with a scalp in one's hands, in order to receive presents.

Baling - Manobo, Philippines: the action of a woman who, when she wants to marry a man, goes to his house and refuses to leave until marriage is agreed upon.

Dona - Yamana, Chile: to take lice from a person's head and squash between one's teeth.

Oka/SHETE - Ndonga, Nigeria: urination difficulties caused by eating frogs before the rain has duly fallen.

Pisan Zapra - Malay: the time needed to eat a banana.

Physiggoomai - Ancient Greek: excited by eating garlic.

Baffona - Italian: an attractive moustachioed woman.

Layogenic - Tagalog, Philippines: a person who is only goodlooking from a distance.

Rhwe - South Africa: to sleep on the floor without a mat while drunk and naked.

Shvitzer - Yiddish: someone who sweats a lot, especially a nervous seducer.

Gattara - Italian: a woman, often old and lonely, who devotes herself to stray cats.

Creerse La Ultima Coca-COLA EN EL DESIERTO - Central American Spanish: to have a very high opinion of oneself, literally to "think one is the last Coca-Cola in the desert".

Vrane Su Mu Popile Mozak - Croatian: crazy, literally "cows have drunk his brain".

Du Kannst Mir Gern Den Buckel Runterrutschen Und Mit Der Zunge Bremsen - Austrian German: abusive insult, literally "you can slide down my hunchback using your tongue as a brake".

Tener Una Cara De Telefono Ocupado - Puerto Rican Spanish: to be angry, literally "to have a face like a busy telephone".

Bablat - Hebrew: baloney, but is an acronym of "beelbool beytseem le-lo takhleet" which means "bothering someone's testicles for no reason".

Vai A Fava - Portuguese: get lost, literally "go to the fava bean".

Rombhoru - Bengali: a woman having thighs as shapely as banana trees.

Tako-NYODU - Japanese: a baldy, literally an "octopus monk".

Snyavshi Shtany, PO VOLOSAM NE GLADYAT - Russian: once you've taken off your pants it's too late to look at your hair.

Mariteddu Tamant'e Un Ditu Ieddu Voli Essa Rivaritu - Corsican: a husband must be respected even if he is very short.

Bayram Degil (SEYRAN DEGIL ENISTE BENI NIYE OPTU? - Turkish: there must be something behind this. Literally "it's not festival time, it's not a pleasure trip, so why did my brother-in-law kiss me"?

MAHARANI LESLEY

HAHAHA Let's go to India with Lesley. She's a funny little fucker.

P.S. Maharani means queen in Hindi.

I FUCKING LIVE FOR THIS SHIT

For the first time since October the sun rose on Saturday in the small town of Longyearbyen, Norway.

I stole this bit of article from StarTribune

Elke Morgner and Allison Bailey, two graduate students at the research institute here, were hacking though ice six miles outside of Longyearbyen this week to take measurements from the underlying tundra when they saw a sliver of sunlight peek around a mountain. Despite temperatures of 4 below (-40 with windchill), they put down their tools and stared.
Then, as they worked, the shaft of light grew to fill a large swath of the valley. On their way home, they made a beeline with their snowmobiles for the light. And there it was, between two mountains: the sun.
"Look at it!" they shouted in unison. "Look at it!" The scientists hugged, did little jigs in the snow, and then stood motionless, awe-struck. Back on campus in town, advance reports about the solar spotting filtered in, and other students headed off on snowmobiles to check it out.
"How did it look?" a student asked, as others clustered around a returnee peeling off his outer clothes in the lobby of the institute, University Studies in Svalbard, named for the island. "Beautiful," he said. Then he thought for a moment and added, "Bright!"

I can just imagine how much of a big deal that is. I would die out there, as I think I am one of those people with S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder), where the dreary London weather can fuck up my day. But all the same, ever since I sadly sat through 30 Days of Night, I have gained a sort of obsession with going out there, either Alaska or Norway, or any of the other Arctic towns that have to dish out alcohol ration cards to their pale inhabitants in the dead of constant night. I think as a writer, that would be a fucking awesome thing to sit through and moan about in a notebook. I can totally picture my diary entries.

Monday 6th January

Still no sun. I have already finished the one bottle of Jim Beam given to me for the week. I should go to Jack around the corner who makes really authentic fake liquor ration cards but he's probably out skiing. I'm screwed. I guess I'll go back to bed. Was that a vampire at my window?

I am so there...one of these days. I should start saving up for the expensive ass winter gear I am going to have to buy. The coats I buy in London hardly do shit because I choose them for fashion and price over function. So it really boils down to the coat I wear out there. Because if I'm freezing, and I haven't got any liquor, I'm going to give that town hell.

HOLY SHIT DOT COM

People are visiting my blog from other blogs, like this one, which can only mean two things:

1) I love my Feedjit WAY more than yesterday

2) Other people in the world know of me and like me! WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT The Lonely Londoner would gather some friends.

So, I just want to say thank you for reading, keep reading, and HELLO! *SMOOCH*

FEEDJIT LOVE

Boy, do I love my Feedjit. I'm seeing people visiting me from New Mexico, Western Finland, Korea(!), Germany, Athens, Trinidad(naturally, had to bribe the friendies), San Jose, CA(giggles). I better post daily and devotedly and keep my international readers happy! I know I'M happy!

THANK YOU FOR VISITING MY BLOG! PLEASE COME AGAIN!

Okay, gotta get back to reading "Midnight All Day" before World Book Day ends. Ciao!

QUIT BEING A SOGGY-FACED EMO ABOUT VALENTINE'S DAY!

I meant to say in my last post, before I got so excited about it, that from now on I will be trying to remember to post a Japanese phrase everyday, that should help me on my way to striking up a convo with Takeshi Kaneshiro if I ever see him, as well as teaching you guys a little sumthin-sumthin interesting.

And as today is Valentine's day, which I have, by the way, Superpoked my friends on Facebook to boycott, I will give you a love-related phrase:

ai- love

ai shiteru- I love you

Also, here's an interesting link on how the Japanese celebrate Valentine's day and what the colour red symbolizes for them.

If you're not fond of Japanese and want to show your significant other how many languages you can express your love to him/her in then here's how to do that. From Spanish to Maltese to Borat's native tongue.

And if you're simply not ready to face the 'holiday' just yet, did you know different countries celebrate it different days? Different months even!(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine). September in Colombia, June in Brazil, ALL the way back around in January for Wales, or just like...a week later in Romania (in case you have 'the bitchy fits' A.K.A. your period that week or something. I mean, you can totally wait 'til you find a love interest first then choose the nearest V-date after that, instead of O.D.ing on Rockie Road on the 14th. (I hope people don't actually do that in real life)

What are your plans for V-day, or as my friends are calling it, S.A. Day (Singles Awareness Day)? As I don't have a valentine this time around and have never really celebrated it, I plan to catch a movie with a dear friend, who just so happens to be male, and maybe I may treat myself to some long-desired okonomiyaki and mochi ice cream; maybe even some Asahi (japanese) beer. There's also an Anti-Valentine's Day celebration on tonight at one of the campus bars, held by the Deviant Society, which I supposedly am a member of. But I went to that last year and decided that if I felt lonely and shitty in the evening, when I knew across the globe my ex-boyfriend was preparing to host a V-day singles party at his flat, I would check out this cool underground lounge/club called Ginglik in Shepherd's Bush that is having a small V-day tribute with live bands etc. So I am set! HAVE A GREAT DAY EVERYONE!

STOLEN FROM TRENDINISTA

O.M.G New favourite website alert. Next time I go to San Francisco, I'mma look out for them and give 'em my best. http://www.kanankids.com/

The photography! The Fashion! The Bay Area, baby!

ITEM OF THE DAY

I would play carnival if you could buy the pieces of the costume separately, because all I want for Carnival is this...

DIRTY PRETTY THINGS FOR CARNIVAL

Back home, in Trinidad and Tobago, at this very moment, my friends, and pretty much half the country, as well as some thousand tourists, are all suited up in the streets of Port of Spain 'playin' a mas'. While I would love to be there with a beastly cold beer in hand and practically nothing but sequins and beads on my body, I have a short story to write out here for class tomorrow. I checked out some of this year's costumes to see what I was missing out. Not much apparently, since I'm not one to parade around public in a bikini (body sensitive, which is totally out of character for a woman of the caribbean. Ah well). Plus I'd much rather put $500 US towards a trip to South America. Here are some of my favourite tidbits of costume this year. Carnival can be fashion and art too, not just indecent exposure!

N.B My favourite carnival piece needs a post of its own. It's so beautiful. I'm making it my Item of the Day. So, see above. Otherwise, HAPPY CARNIVAL 2K8. Act and drink responsibly, and have fun!

LETTERS VIA FISH

I just read this cool article on yahoo! news about a japanese girl who sent out a letter in a balloon 15 years ago, and a fisherman finding it on a fish. It's still legible too! The letter wasn't very interesting but I'd like to try this very soon. I'll get back to you when I do! Here's the article:

Japanese girl's letter returned 15 years later ... by fish
Fri Jan 25, 1:30 PM ET

A letter that a young girl in Japan sent into the sky in a balloon some 15 years ago has been found on a fish hauled from 1,000 metres (3,300 feet) below the Pacific.
A fisherman found the still legible piece of paper sitting on a sticky flatfish in his catch on Thursday, along with a torn-off string and the fragment of a red balloon.
He opened the folded paper, discovering it was a handwritten letter from a six-year-old girl at an elementary school in Kawasaki, 150 kilometres (93 miles) away from where the fish was caught off Choshi port.
The sender, Natsumi Shirahige, and her friends released letters as part of events to mark the school's 120th anniversary, which was in 1993.
"Our school is 120 years old... If you pick up this letter, please write to me," the letter reads, listing the school's address.
The 52-year-old fisherman said the letter was a nice surprise.
"I've been in fishing for a long time but this is unbelievable," the smiling man told the Asahi television network.
Shirahige, now a 21-year-old university student, said: "I can't get over the wonder of how the letter survived 15 years. I never expected I'd get a reply this way."

AUSTRALIA DAY!: IT ALL MAKES PERFECT SENSE NOW!

So yesterday, two of my best 'mates' and I decided to have a night out. We ended up on Putney High Street. All down the stretch was a mass of bobbing cowboy hats, not to mention Walkabout, the popular Australian Bar and Restaurant was packed to capacity, with a line of hopefuls waiting to get in at the door; everyone dressed in the native colours. We brushed it off as either some rugby/cricket/football/any other sporting option of your choice event that we clearly were under a rock about.

But the masses were really confusing me that night. We looked around us deciding on a place to dine and my eyes stopped on a suspicious character across the street playing a bagpipe. My friend said, in her best Pikey accent (she thinks she's Irish) "But the bagpipes are from Scotland, right?" I nodded quizzically. Then, I noticed a lot of the Aussie crowd was wearing yellow and green (I suppose like the colours of the uniform for their cricket team). I particularly remember this cute half asian chick in head to toe yellow and green knee socks, flats, mini skirt and beanie (with the stitching 'I Love Australia' and a quaint little ball on top). With all her green and yellow waving at me in the face, I INSTANTLY thought Brazilian food!

There is a quaint little Brazilian restuarant, which opened up last year, just a few buildings away from Walkabout. We went there for a massive brasilero buffet. The food tasted like a Sao Paoloan mother's lovingly home-cooked meal. SO glad I found that place. SO upset that I can't remember the name for you, but I assure you, it's the only Brazilian place on the high street. What I later realised about the place, however, that made me glum for a minor tenth of a second, was that I had been there before, with my ex-boyfriend on a date. It used to be Italian. I ordered a Copacabana and moved on.

HAPPY BELATED AUSTRALIA DAY, ALL.

P.S this is also such a shame, what with Aussie Heath Ledger's recent death and all :(