Friday, 8 February 2008


I have been clinically depressed for several years now. Recently I've been trying very hard to work at being a happy person in my own skin, everyday, just living life to the fullest and saying 'yes' more. I want to take some time right now to see what lifted my mood today because I think it's a really useful exercise. Here are some reasons why I am happy today:

I started off my day with a complete and healthy breakfast (which I never do. I never manage to be awake for breakfast): a bunch of seedless grapes, two slices of peanut butter and honeyed toast, a glass of grapefruit juice and episodes 3 and 4 of My So Called Life.

I did 33 miles on the bike at the gym today. That is over 400 calories and over 70 minutes. And the cool thing about it was I didn't even notice because I was too busy watching Scrubs and Smallwille on the little monitor on my bike.

I got a very very part time job, but it's money all the same. I'm working Friday mornings and Tuesday afternoons at a yoga centre in Fulham. And it's great because I get free access to the studio and I'm a big yoga buff. Yoga is so therapeutic; excellent for the mind and body. The breathing has done wonders for my mood/depression in the past. In fact, it is my psychiatrist who introduced it to me. After just three weeks of practising it, I was significantly more flexible, I was super energetic and not always tired and sleeping like I was before and my brain felt 'aired out'. Thinking and doing homework was such a breezy task. I loved it. GREAT BENEFITS, GUYS!

I am in love with this week's Writing Fiction homework. Snapshot stories. They're stories that don't really have a point. It's just It's stories where people don't change in the end, nothing really changes, it's just people living. Because, in life, not everyone ends up a hero or lives happily ever after, or not. It just...keeps going...yuh know? Snapshot stories also don't really reveal much. It's like looking at people from a park bench. You may not really know all the details but they're saying and acting and feeling nonetheless.
I nearly cried reading Hanif Kureishi's 'Four Blue Chairs'. So simple, yet so poignant. Also, read Ernest Hemingway's 'Hills Like White Elephants'. Beautiful. I am working on my own snapshot short as we speak/read/write/whatever.

I still have 15 more episodes of My So Called Life to go through. It may not be much, but 15 is better than 0. The show was genius, and truly missed by many I'm sure. It's also great seeing the plaid/grunge clothing overload in the show. Seriously, every outfit Angela Chase/Claire Danes wears has an aspect of great plaid in it. I'd love to wear their stuff now. I DO have a couple plaid items but there was also the outfit she borrowed from Rayanne in the first episode to go to 'Let's Bolt'. Gorgeous!
Also, when she first dyes her hair crimson, I totally got back the urge to start back dying/killing my hair. I had a new colour every month, I swear! I won't tell you guys what I'm going for at the moment, until I actually get it. She's been really inspiring me as of late. My two coolest most inspirational movie characters are Kat Stratford/Julia Stiles in 10 Things...(which I just bought, along with MSCL), and her, Claire Danes as Angela Chase.
I vow, when I make it big in the writing world, to revive this amazing tv series, or at least try to come as close as I can to it. Nothing can touch MSCL. It was the Nirvana of TV. And that means it was rad. lol

I made amazing eggs with chili sauce. Try it sometime.

I wrote roughly 950 words of my short story today. Coming along nicely...

Today I thought I was beautiful. And two people told me so today as well!

Love is still alive. This is sort of a 'read between the lines' thing BUT! I will say it again, because it's also true the way it's written here. Love is still ALIVE!

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